My hands grip the sides of the bathroom counter. My eyes lock on the face in the mirror. “Mama?”
May 4th, 2012. My handsome husband and I are celebrating his 22nd birthday with friends, eating dinner and seeing The Avengers premier. Kip’s Mama and siblings came into town to surprise him and join us for the festivities. It was a blast, Kip was surprised, and “The Avengers” movie was awesome. Mission accomplished. On the way home from all the excitement, it was a pretty sleepy ride for both of us. Words came out of my mouth before they made it to my brain. “Kip, what would you do if we found out we were pregnant?” It was just a question, and I was curious. He told me how happy he would be, and that a child (even this early in marriage) would be a blessing. I echoed his thoughts, and the subject of conversation changed. By the time we got home, I had such a crazy headache I passed out without telling Kip one last “Happy Birthday.”
The next morning I woke up when Kip was already gone to work. Something in me clicked; something felt different. I got out of bed and went straight for the pregnancy test I’d had in the cabinet for a while (out of paranoia). I did was what was required of me, set the test on the bathroom counter, and went about my business, brushing my teeth and doing my normal morning routine. I put one contact in my eye, blinked, and looked at the test. I could see the first line clearly, and there appeared to be a faint… second… naahhh. I put in my other contact and focused for a few seconds. There, on that little funny-looking stick, were two pink lines. Positive. Pregnant. Baby in belly. I didn’t scream, or jump up and down, or cry… I just stood there and looked at it. I gripped the counter and looked at myself in the mirror and thought, “Mama. Me?!”
I drove straight out to Sanger, where Kip was working at the time, and he could tell something was going on. I sat down next to him, and pulled out the pregnancy test I had brought in a plastic baggie. (Is that creepy?! Kip makes fun of me for that. I mean, it was in a completely secure little bag. No pee on anything except what ought to be peed on. I think that’s totally okay.) His hazel-green eyes lit up, and the most beautiful, genuine smile crossed his face. He had anticipated his reaction correctly: he was (and still is) happy and this is a blessing.
1 year ago today, we found out our Rosebud existed. Now we have this beautiful, wonderful, almost-14-week-old little girl. We celebrated Kip’s birthday by staying home with a fussy baby, finally laying her down for a nap and taking one with her. 😉 As I sit and type, I hear Kip playing peek-a-boo and blowing raspberries on Rosebud’s tummy. 🙂 What a difference a year can make in circumstances and in people’s hearts. I know we have been forever changed by this little life, and I’m very thankful that I am, in fact, a Mama. 🙂